If you have been feeling lost recently, you may have noticed that it felt uncomfortable. Yet some of you may have felt curiously happy. Either way, and many other ways, your system may be opting for an upgrade. According to the model of ACT (Aceeptance and Commitment Therapy) being in the present moment AND feeling lost can offer a new possibility. New possibilities is the cure for feeling stuck. “Feeling lost is a normal part of learning new things, and hopelessness is likely to be a common reaction from someone who has repeatedly had a hard time accomplishing goals related to his values” (referenced below).
Part of what I experience from time to time is coming back to a goal and realizing that it is not getting accomplished. I then look to what I have been using (tools, strategies). When I begin to FEEL negative about the realization, I give up. What I am learning is that if I sit with the goal and determine if it fits my values, then I create willingness to experience and then try something new. Eventually, the goal either becomes obsolete or is realized.
I value family, I value learning, I value contribution. These are working right now in this. moment as I return to checking in on my high schooler’s final exams. Then I return to reading more from the book referenced below. Then I meet with 5 clients today.
Jason B. Luoma, PhD, Steven C. Hayes, PhD, Robyn D. Walser, PhD (2017). Learning ACT An Acceptance & Commitment Therapy Skills Training manual for Therapists. (p.137 Kindle). Oakland, CA. Context Press.